depressed

hello.. today's the 17th of March, tuesday! sorry i haven't been updating. hahs. photos on no uniform day and BC day will be posted soon! sorry! ><> i have a pile of homework but it looks more like Mount Everest than a pile of homework. and i have fallen ill. hahs. great man.. i have fallen in love with TRACK! hahas. it's really fun to be with them. i'm s fortunate to have so many people care for me. oh well.. hmm.. oh yes. i attended a charity dinner. some gala thingy. those people are really rich. i have some photos. but i haven't uploaded them into my comp. my throat really hurts. there was PE today. yupp.. my timing SUCKS big time.. but i have a REASON. i was sick. i had fever in the middle of the night! woke up at 4a.m and took my temp. it was 38 degrees. then i tried going back to sleep but i ended up sweating under my blanket and not sleeping. so then i tried pulling myself out of bed. it was HORRIBLE. my muscles ached like i fell down from the 6th floor and managed to live with only a few scratches. it's been terrible.. i FEEL terrible.. i was so DUMB! sighs..

i want somebody to listen to me.. someone much closer and a really good listener. i really have to thank my junior/son - kaiyang - for messaging me so much nowadays and put up with all my rubbish and sappiness. :) he's a really good boy. hahas. :D mummy loves you! lols. xD i really like this guy [not kaiyang].. sighs.. but i think i shouldn't. what with 'O's and well, i just ended my previous relationship. but at least there's no hard feelings...? anyway, i just can't stop thinking about what i did. i feel stupid. it's the first time i did this kind of thing. being so stupidly honest. [what were you thinking woman?!] i was pretty disappointed when he didn't like, acknowledge. well, yeah. i only said i was telling him.. i feel so MESSED UP. anyway, he likes someone else. so.. hmm.. i have no shame, really. typing this when i know he can see it.. give me brains! never mind. a blog is also another form of listening... what.......? am i saying..? it's driving me nuts. i keep thinking about _ _ _. but i shouldn't. SIGHS! i'm such a loser sometimes when it comes to these kind of things.. i still haven't told my mother. hmm.. i should really stop doing this. i really feel like poop nowadays.. help..! it's just bad.. I.AM.HOPELESS.

oh yeah. my mother's going to screw me tonight. AGAIN. she's been rather abusive these days. used a hanger and it broke. just because i did NOTHING at home. she tried to slap me because i was going to wear my skinnies to my tuition. AND, later, she's going to "settle" with me tonight for going to track when i'm sick. i think she's the one who's sick. goodness..

i'd better go soon. i haven't bathe! lols. >.<" i have homework!!!! and i still haven't clear my doggies' poop.. @.@ photos another time! sorry! oh yeah. i wanna change my blogskin soon. okay, bye~ :D

-i can't help it :(